Welcome to Plucky Charms! dot net My name is Plucky. I like women, in the sense that I’m a tremendous lesbian. I like men in the sense that I think they’re delightful to hang out with and I need lots of them in my life to balance out all this lesbian estrogen I’ve got going [...]
Happy Ash Wednesday – I’m Giving Up My Clothes For Lent!
It’s Ash Wednesday. See what I did there? Yeah you do, horror fans. That one was just for you. Today is the day we give up things that aren’t particularly good for us in accordance with a religious doctrine that isn’t all that good for us either. I’m giving up dildos rolled in glitter and time consuming activities [...]
Happy NERDI Gras to all my Bronies. I’ve already unwrapped your gift.
Both Captain EditorPants and myself are originally from New Orleans. Unfortunately, we’re not in New Orleans. I’m in nerdcave with plaid wallpaper and he’s in a geekhut with 8 monitors and a special weathervane that tells him what Google thinks we should all find interesting today. But that doesn’t mean we can’t celebrate. So what [...]
Cool Man Things – Cigars and the Three Best Places to Buy Them
I think it’s sexy when guys smoke cigars, not that it matters because I’m gayer than flannel plaid at a marriage equality rally. But I do have a vagina and an opinion that jibes with reality 9/10 times (I enjoyed Iron Man II and for that I will not apologize) so when I say that [...]
Things I’m Not Proud Of: Why I’m Going To See The Phantom Menace In 3 Epic Dimensions
Being a Star Wars fan is sort of like being Catholic except instead of 10% of our incomes, George Lucas gets 2 hours of our lives and a cut of the price of admission every time he re-releases his one of the digitally remastered and forever altered films in what I’m sure must be the [...]
Plucky Charms On Inevitability – This May Change Your Life
One of my mules is old. Like really old. So old that when he was born, it was still considered kosher to name mules after black folk heroes. Seriously, his name is John Henry. No one seems to remember who the John Henry of legend was, which is just as well because there is something [...]
NERDY MASH-UP SATURDAY CONTINUES!
I am definitely hungover and I am definitely at work and I would definitely love to bury myself in last night’s cheap Mexican leftovers and then throw it all up again in 20 minutes because I’m the last person on the planet who still thinks Smirnoff Ice is a phenomenal idea. But I’m holding steady, [...]
SABADO GIGANTE! It’s nerdy mash-up Saturday!
If you didn’t just nostalgia HARD all over your keyboard, your childhood lacked at least one fundamental ingredient that starts with R and ends with EN & STIMPY. Let’s pretend that none of you saw me tweet photos of my cat captioned with quotes from Pulp Fiction at 2am and that I am of sound [...]
GOP Oversight Committee Hearing – Just Five Bros Talking ‘Bout Hoes
This is a photo from yesterday’s hearing on birth control. These five BROS testified on women’s health as it pertains to their access to birth control. As you can see, three of these BROS are religious leaders. Men, you know I think the world of you. You know I’m in your corner all the [...]
Plucky’s Law of Blowjob Averages – Get the Hell Out Of Your House!
Dear Plucky, So how do I find date-able women when I don’t drink, do bars, coffee shops, or bookstores? Your friend, Homebound? You’re not into bars. You’re not into coffee shops. You’re not into bookstores. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, SIR? The thing about meeting women is that it’s kind of a numbers game. Okay, not [...]
What I Got For Valentine’s Day: A post for my single guys
I’m single, which is shocking when you consider what a delightful young lady I am. Shocking, I tell you! Even when you’re vocally and aggressively apposed to the entire institution of Valentine’s Day on the basis that no one actually knows anything about Saint Valentine, it’s hard to watch everyone around you exchanging diamond tennis [...]
An Ode To Saint Valentine, Patron Saint of Beekeepers
Saint Valentinus was a martyr, and not a particularly interesting one as far as martyrs go. He died during the reign of Claudius II and so little is known about him that the pope who established the feast of St. Valentine to honor the martyrs of his time referred to these martyrs as those “… [...]
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