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Mark Ruffalo is so troll and other fun Avengers related news.

Yeah, I live on io9 now. It’s this guy’s fault. I was so busy wasting valuable office time on facebook and working out the logistics of moving one of those big fancy Craftmatic adjustable beds from one side of town to the other without turning my mattress into roadkill that I neglected to do that thing where I [...]

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april-fools

My first act of epic Jesus-ery shall be…

April Fool’s bronycorns! Of course I didn’t find Jesus! I can’t even find a pair of matching socks! Yeah, I’m still the same hell-bound slut waffle you can’t live without and I’m not going to take the butt plug out of my ass any time soon. I’m still gonna walk around in a bikini talking [...]

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JESUS!

REVELATION!

I have an announcement to make, bronies. As of last night, when the Holy Spirit came unto me and anointed me with the knowledge that I’ve been A BIG FAT SINNER this whole time, I have accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior and must now practice secondary virginity as atonement for all that lesbian sex. [...]

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SABADO GIGANTE! It’s Nerdy Mash-Up Saturday Again Dammit!

It’s not even 5pm and we’ve already covered safe sex, animal husbandry, and somehow we also managed to brush awkwardly up against beastiality. Sorry about that, you guys. Had to be done, really. So in order to make up for that really uncomfortable talk we had earlier about putting a condom on your penis before [...]

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PRACTICE SAFE SEX! Starring my very pregnant goat

My goat’s eggo is so preggo right now that she can’t even scratch her own butt. She requires assistance and I have the photos to prove it. This is one of those unplanned pregnancies that happens when you don’t bother separating the young buck with testicles that dangle down by his hocks from the rest [...]

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STAR WARS *cue music*

Sometimes I’m called upon to give advice that falls outside of garden variety dating/sex/relationship advice and squarely within the realm of pure unadulterated nerdery. I’m happy to oblige. Fresh from the PluckyCharms mailbag comes this query from loyal reader JohnnyC. He writes: So exactly in what order should I watch the Star Wars movies? JohnnyC [...]

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NEW POLISH AVENGERS TRAILER GIVES ZERO FUCKS ABOUT EVERYONE EXCEPT BLACK WIDOW!

Apparently Ginger ScarJo in a Kevlar body suit is HUGE in Poland, because this new Avengers trailer swipes footage from Iron Man II in order to more accurately demonstrate her character’s development over the course of the two films from totes adorbz lady assassin to totes adorbz lady assassin with a sassy, no-nonsense bob. We [...]

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Zoey and Rochelle from L4D and L4D2

Apocalypse Now! New Rules for Choosing a Post-Annihilation Mate

In today’s installment of our continuing series on how to effectively find and woo a suitable partner in a post-apocalyptic landscape, I’ll be laying out a revised system for choosing your Miss Right that takes the circumstances of your situation into account. In the past I’ve laid out a handy-dandy three star criteria for establishing [...]

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Grave Mistake, Buried Alive, Mysterious Curse, Decades of Dysfunction

Sexy Nerdy Lady Thing of the Day! Dark Shadows Nail Polish

While the rest of you are nursing your tremendous hardons for The Hunger Games even though we all know it’s been Battle Royale this whole time, I’ve remained loyal to both the upcoming Avengers movie and Tim Burton’s goofy reinvention of Dark Shadows. It’s a good thing one of us is paying attention because in [...]

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zombie-dating

Apocalypse Now! No Really, Like Right Now!

Fresh off of io9.com are a set of photos depicting empty cities in what would be the earliest days of a post-apocalyptic world. Vacant streets, abandoned cars, few if any travelers hauling only what they can carry on foot. Ah, the end. I can get a little intense when discussing apocalyptic scenarios and how those of us [...]

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sabbdo-gigante

Sabado Gigante! – Introducing the Plucky Griddle Sammich!

Today’s special Cooking With Plucky Edition of Nerdy Mashup Saturday is brought to you by the letter CHEESE and the number BACON. Instead of slamming two fandoms together like I normally do, I’ll be mashing up the greatest breakfast foods known to man to form a breakfast Voltron called the Plucky Griddle Sammich. I don’t [...]

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DINOSAURS YOU GUYS! Symphony of Science

Welcome to the exact moment you realized that science is the only thing that should ever be autotuned with the exception of news anchors and political pundits. Before I get back to our regularly scheduled programming – movie trailers, insomniac musings, occasional dating advice – I’d like to take a few minutes to get really [...]

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Ugly Shit – Who Gets The Dog When We Get a Divorce?

Let’s pretend like this post isn’t just an excuse for me to show off video of my goat back when she was a baby and living in the house with me. Why was she living in the house? BECAUSE THAT’S WHERE BABY ANIMALS ARE MEANT TO LIVE! They are also meant to sit in the [...]

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